Welcome to the Superbowl edition of The Macguffin Men.\u00a0 While every network and sports blog will be comparing the 2 quarterbacks facing off today, we\u2019d like to do something different here.\u00a0 While Aaron Rodgers is a very talented player, I don\u2019t find him very interesting.\u00a0 I\u2019m not sure what it is that I don\u2019t like about him but other than his touchdown celebration of putting on an invisible belt, he\u2019s just not that interesting to me.\u00a0 He plays like Brett Favre but minus the interceptions (in fact he has the lowest interception percentage in the NFL), so I really should like him, and maybe one day I will, but for now he doesn\u2019t do much for me.\u00a0 For this reason, instead of Aaron Rodgers, I will compare the man they call Big Ben to the real Big Ben in London, England.\u00a0 Many people will be quick to point out that \u2018Big Ben\u2019 only refers to the bell, not the tower as a whole.\u00a0 This would be wrong for two reasons.\u00a0 First, the phrase has been used so many times to refer to the entire structure that is has effectively changed the meaning.\u00a0 That\u2019s just how language works.\u00a0 \u2018Impossible\u2019 should really be \u2018inpossible\u2019 but so many people said and wrote it the other way that the new spelling is now correct and \u2018inpossible\u2019 gets a red underline in Microsoft Word.\u00a0 Second, as far as Roethlisberger is concerned, the \u2018Big Ben\u2019 name originally didn\u2019t refer to all of Roethlisberger either.\u00a0 It was a nickname he originally made for his penis but it caught on so well that people referring to all of Ben Roethlisberger as Big Ben and the nickname stuck (citation needed).<\/p>\n

Big Ben: Victoria tower without a clock and with a history of being used\u00a0for establishing that characters are now in London<\/p>\n

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Big Ben <\/p><\/div>\n
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Ben Roethlisberger: Jim Halpert as a jock. Or John Krasinski with a beard.\u00a0 Either way.<\/p>\n
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Maybe instead of flirting with Pam for 4 seasons, I should just show her my dick...<\/p><\/div>\n
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I shouldn't be so happy about being compared to a rapist<\/p><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
BEST QUOTE:<\/div>\n
Big Ben:\u00a0 “BONG BONG BONG BONG BONG” (The sound of the bells when the clock strikes the hour)<\/div>\n
Ben Roethlisberger:\u00a0 \u201cAll my bitches, take some shots!\u201d\u00a0 Now I should state this quote is only alleged to have actually been said.\u00a0 Despite sounding like something from a Rick James skit from Chappelle\u2019s Show it was actually included in the police report of his most recent victim of sexual assault (that we know of).\u00a0\u00a0In fact, if you Google the phrase, the first couple pages of hits are all about Roethlisberger. In her story, it was allegedly said to a group of a girls that he had allegedly been flirting with all night.\u00a0 He\u00a0allegedly approached them at the bar, ordered rounds of tequila shots and shouted the witty line with his alleged dick hanging out.\u00a0 Allegedly\u2026<\/div>\n
RESILIENCE<\/div>\n
Big Ben: On May 10^{th<\/sup>, 1941, London was under heavy attack from the German Luftwaffe Air Force.\u00a0 Some of their bombs struck the tower, damaging the roof, two of the clock face and destroying the House of Commons chamber section of the structure.\u00a0 The clock continued to keep proper time and the bells kept ringing throughout the Blitz.<\/div>\n}
Ben Roethlisberger:\u00a0Roethlisberger has been through various kinds of damage thoughout his career, most of which was avoidable.\u00a0 On June 12^{th<\/sup>, 2006, he was in a fairly serious motorcycle accident.\u00a0 He did not have a helmet or the proper license to be operating a motorcycle.\u00a0 He hit a Chrysler and went over the handlebars, smashing the car\u2019s windshield with his head.\u00a0 The accident resulted in several injuries to Ben\u2019s head and face including a broken upper and lower jaw, a broken nose, a fracture to his right sinus cavity, a 9 inch laceration to the back of the head, the chipping of several teeth, the loss of 2 teeth and the breaking of a blood vessel in his mouth which he states would have killed him in a few minutes if paramedics hadn\u2019t arrived when they did.\u00a0Just this season, Roethlisberger had his nose broken during a game.\u00a0 While playing the Oakland Raiders, Roethlisberger can be seen speaking with Raider Richard Seymour after a play.\u00a0After hearing what was likely an insult to his team\u2019s performance and\/or his momma,}Seymour punched Ben in the nose, breaking it.<\/a><\/div>\n
Due to his failure to wear a helmet while riding his motorcycle and the sexual assault allegations, Roethlisberger is often under intense media scrutiny but manages to do well.\u00a0 He missed 4 games this season and was under the microscope more than he\u2019s ever been in his career and still got his team to the biggest game of the year.<\/p>\n
ABILITY TO INFLICT MENTAL DAMAGE:<\/p>\n
Big Ben:\u00a0\u00a0The man who designed Big Ben was named\u00a0Augustus Webly Northmore Pugin.\u00a0 Big Ben was his last design before going insane.<\/p>\n
Ben Roethlisberger:\u00a0 He seems to be driving Terry Bradshaw insane.\u00a0 In the 70s, Terry Bradshaw won 4 Superbowls for the Pittsburgh Steelers.\u00a0 He now does commentary for NFL games.\u00a0 Bradhaw and Roethlisberger had something of a public feud in the last little while.\u00a0 Bradshaw first insulted Ben’s intelligence for riding his motorcycle without a helmet.\u00a0 After the allegations of sexual assualt came out, Bradshaw’s opinion of Roethlisberger sunk even lower.\u00a0 They wouldn’t even shake hands or speak to each other after Bradshaw’s opinion became public.\u00a0 Bradshaw states this is because he has daughters that are around the age of the Roethlisberger’s alleged victims.\u00a0 Some people suspect that Bradshaw’s negative feelings towards Ben have more to do with jealousy.\u00a0 Ben has already won 2 Superbowls, could win his third today and has enough time left in his young career to conceivably win rings 4 & 5, thereby overshadowing Bradshaw’s remarkable achievement.<\/p>\n
PLAYING IN THE CLUTCH:<\/p>\n
Big Ben:\u00a0 For 2 years during World War 1, the clock faces were darkened and the bells silenced to avoid attacks by German Zeppelins.\u00a0 It gets the job done even in times of war.<\/p>\n
Ben Roethlisbeger:\u00a0Roethlisberger is often praised for his ability to play under pressure.\u00a0 He has been compared to his childhood idol John Elway for this 4^{th<\/sup> quarter comebacks.\u00a0 He also does well in the playoffs, including a spectacular finish to win Superbowl XL.\u00a0 Down by 3 points, Ben took the field with 2:30 on the clock.\u00a0 9 plays and 88 yards later, he found Santonio Holmes in the endzone with 35 seconds left for what would be the game winner.<\/p>\n}
BEST PICTURE I COULD FIND:<\/p>\n
Big Ben:<\/p>\n
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"I hope that's the sun and not more flying Nazis..."<\/p><\/div>\n
Ben Roethlisberger:<\/div>\n
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His "Rape like a Winner" shirt was in the wash<\/p><\/div>\n
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CAUSE OF LEAN:<\/p>\n
Big Ben:\u00a0Changes in ground condition due to the construction of the Jubilee Line of the London Tube has caused the tower to lean slightly.<\/p>\n
Ben Roethlisberger:\u00a0 He’s wasted.<\/p>\n
HOSTED WWE MONDAY NIGHT RAW:<\/p>\n
Big Ben:\u00a0 Not yet…<\/p>\n
Ben Roethlisberger:\u00a0 Hell yeah!<\/p>\n
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Doing the "Suck It" on TV totally doesn't make you look like a rapist<\/p><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
So that’s about it.\u00a0 Hopefully Aaron Rodgers does something so undeniably cool this Superbowl that I get to like him.\u00a0 On that note, I’d like to leave you with a quarterback that I already\u00a0do like in a great picture.\u00a0 Take notes, Aaron.\u00a0 This is a real QB.<\/p>\n
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The goat is a symbol. It stands for Greatest Of All Time.<\/p><\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
James discusses quarterback, clocks, and John Krasinski.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":865,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[3],"tags":[26,71,89,171],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/themacguffinmen.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/214"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/themacguffinmen.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/themacguffinmen.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themacguffinmen.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themacguffinmen.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=214"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/themacguffinmen.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/214\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":864,"href":"https:\/\/themacguffinmen.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/214\/revisions\/864"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themacguffinmen.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/865"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/themacguffinmen.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=214"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themacguffinmen.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=214"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themacguffinmen.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=214"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}